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"A funny ethnic mystery"

Since the death of Rabbi Stu Rothman, Essie Sue Margolis runs the Temple Rita synagogue in Eternal, Texas. Using a statistically invalid and unreliable sampling of the congregation members, Essie Sue informs the board that the new Rabbi Kevin Kerstein has a very low approval rating. To avoid the selection process of a new rabbi, the board including Ruby, the wife of the deceased previous Rabbi, agree to a Caribbean Sea cruise.

Ruby wins the raffle for a free trip, but wonders if she will be sailing with endless tsuris from the aggravation she expects from her companions. The Bargain Tours cruise is filled with cut-rate reductions that makes this a trip worth forgetting though coincidentally the Captain happens to be Essie Sue's cousin. University Professor Gonzales was to provide insight into the historical Jewish population in the area, but he dies while boarding the ship. Ruby finds herself embroiled in a mystery based on the professor's notes while two suitors, the captain and a passenger she likes (who might just be a killer) pursue her.

The third Rabbi's wife mystery, DON'T CRY FOR ME, HOT PASTRAMI, is an amusing who-done-it due to the internal sufferings and asides of Ruby. The story line is fun though a reader might wonder why Ruby puts up with Essie Sue, a professional nudnick. Essie Sue is as aggressive a character one will find in a cozy while the Rabbi needs to borrow some of her chutzpah so he will not continue to look like a putz. Fans of an ethnic who-done-it will enjoy this tale that requires noshing a bagel while reading it.

Harriet Klausner

Reviewed by PNR Group Member
Posted July 9, 2001

Grab the Dramamine. When Essie Sue's latest fundraiser transports Ruby and the congregants of Temple Rita from Eternal, Texas, to a Caribbean cruise ship commanded by a Jewish sea captain, seasickness is the least of their worries." "Essie Sue has conducted a scientific poll that would put Dick Morris

to shame, revealing that her beloved Rabbi Kapstein's job approval ratinghas fallento an all-time low at Temple Rita. In a last-ditch attempt to improve the rabbi's "charisma quotient" (in answer to the question "Is our rabbi as dynamic as you thought he would be?" Kevin scored "one percent"), Essie Sue decides to showcase his leadership ability by having him conduct a tour for temple members. She learns through the kosher grapevine that a long-lost cousin is currently sailing Caribbean for Bargain Cruise Lines - Motto: We Pass Waters Where Others Fear to Tread - A bargain! What could be wrong with that? And when the cruise line is willing to move cabins wholesale for fund-raising purposes, a discount deal is sealed." "Though Ruby loves to travel, this is not the trip of her dreams. The Cruise from Hell begins when Professor Willie Bob Gonzales, the ship's lecturer, dies suddenly in the embarkation area, leaving a laptop full of notes on the Conversos - Jews who became Christians to escape the tortures of the Spanish Inquisition, and who were known to have emigrated to the islands" The food is terrible - Ruby groans from the chefs version of island delights with the flavor of yesterday's Taco Bell, and struggles with the consequences of a bargain voyage - portholes sealed with bubblegum and nightly entertainment by Elvis impersonators. And to make things perfect, Captain Goldberg has the hots for her.

Genre: Cozy Mystery